Are you rationalizing your emotions?

When it comes to feelings, do you feel all your emotions? I often hear people say that feelings don’t matter, to just get over it or work through it. Most conventional wisdom tells us to rationalize our emotions away, often by blaming or excusing others. But our thoughts and projections onto others cannot heal what our body knows and feels.

When we choose to ignore our emotions, we store them in our body where they often cause physical dis-ease. We develop nagging aches, or even more serious illnesses, often becoming triggered by things we hold in our subconscious.

Loving attention for dis-ease

The practice of Biospiritual Focusing allows us to tenderly address the feelings, memories, and trauma stored in our bodies. A practitioner guides you through meditation to help you scan your body and identify where there is discomfort or pain. You may then lovingly hold that wound to the light so it can be healed. This is an on-going practice because scars and dis-ease arrive in layers, only presenting when you are ready to be healed.

My own experience with Biospiritual Focusing:

The memory appeared in my heart, shoulders and arms. I was, maybe, two years old, pulled off my mother’s lap and dragged to the church basement where my dad spanked me. Then he roughly deposited me back into the pew and my mother shot a pitiful glance in my direction.

This is not a new memory, nor is it unusual for me to have a memory from a very young age. My early childhood memories relate to trauma I experienced but never understood. This memory resided in my thoughts for decades as I often pondered the effectiveness of spanking a child. What did I do to invoke my father’s anger? Was I talking? Maybe my mother was pregnant with my brother and didn’t want me on her lap?

A new story.

The return of this memory, in this way, told me a new story. It was not a memory from my head, so I could not rationalize it. It was a memory in my body, something stored in my cells because, as a child, I had no ability to defend myself or resolve the issue. This memory reminded me of the insecurity I still carried within me and why it was there.

As human beings we want to respond to uncomfortable truths by rationalizing them away. It’s what I did for decades when I assumed I was naughty and deserved that spanking. And rationalization is what others encourage me to do when they say that the oldest child always has inexperienced parents. Rationalization wants us to explain away our trauma as benign and formative, perhaps for our own good or even deserved. Rationalization keeps us in our heads, so we don’t feel the pain.

This body memory will not be rationalized, and it will not be ignored. It emerged into the light, and I now see that this was never a puzzle for me to solve. It was a stone that rolled over my truest Self and sealed it from the outside world. I now release this memory from my body.

Would you like to experience the healing power of Biospiritual Focusing? This practice may be done with a partner or by yourself. It may also be provided via remote session. Book a session here.